Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Chris' LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, April 21st, 2009
10:40 pm	Top 10 Heroes of Fiction Okay, so I had fun with my top 10 villains, so I thought I'd turn around and write my favorite heroes. Once again, the rules are--no manga/anime, no comic books, since they'd dominate the rankings. That being said, here we go: 10. Jack Burton/Ash--Oh yeah. These two get a tie vote. Mr. Burton comes to us from the John Carpenter classic, Big Trouble in Little China. Jack gets on here for not only being a hero, but being cool. His "Jack Burton says" lines are hysterical, and unlike other heroes, Jack's no fool. He's a hard-talking guy who is utterly, utterly out of his league and he keeps on going, utterly unfazed by (arguably unaware of) the dangers. Then there's Ash, the undead-slaying supermarket clerk who rivals Jack Burton in sheer coolness while utterly out of his depth. Ash takes more abuse than any one man should from the undead, including getting his hand possessed. Of course, it takes a special kind of horror-movie hero to fasten a chainsaw to the stump of his arm, grab a shotgun, and transform himself from victim to undead killer. All the while spouting off lines that would sound cheesy coming from anyone else. Neither of these two are *quite* top 10, due to the power and intensity of the actual group, but darn it they deserve to be mentioned. 9. James Bond--The epitome of cool under pressure. Bond's been around long enough, and his legendary smoothness (moreso in the movies than the books), has become iconic enough that it's almost cliche. Sean Connery exemplifies this, showing that Bond will use anything and anyone to achieve his mission. Daniel Craig has roughened him up a little, but the cold-war era Bond is still the man. 8. Scarlet Pimpernel--Perhaps the original action hero. Master of disguise, extremely clever, and all-around dashing, but wrapped up in a Clark Kent-like disguise that he even keeps from his wife. 7. Sherlock Holmes--Edgar Allen Poe created the short detective story and the original master detective of Auguste Dupin, but Sherlock Holmes, based on one of Arthur Conan Doyle's teachers, surely surpasses him. His legendary powers of deduction, an almost obsessive attention to his craft (he knows over 100 kinds of pipe tobacco ash), sets him up as the detective, and his cases are almost as legendary as he. How good is Sherlock Holmes? Consider this--for most cases, he never had to leave home! 6. Indiana Jones--The distillation of pulp heroes. Known for his trusty bullwhip and his fedora, Indiana Jones brought a level of realism to action heroes. He gets shot, he gets stabbed, and in general he gets beaten up a lot during his courses. Still, he's got an undeniable sense of cool, and he's also close enough to the rest of us that we can see ourselves doing the same thing in his position, or at least trying to. 5. The Crow--Not quite as classic as the rest of the people on this list, but he strikes a chord with me because he's a hero that pretty much embodies divine retribution. For those of you that don't know, The Crow is the resurrected Eric Draven, who was murdered along with his girlfriend in Detroit on Devil's Night. He comes back from the dead, brought back by a crow, and goes after the gang who killed him. He's unstoppable and, appropriately enough, is dark. Probably inspired hundreds of Goths, and after reading/watching him, you'll see why. 4. Gandalf--What Indiana Jones did for pulp heroes, Gandalf did for fantasy wizards. I was going to put down Merlin, but Gandalf is more...compelling somehow. Perhaps it's the subtle but powerful nature of his magic, perhaps it's his last stand against the Balrog, but regardless of the reason, Gandalf personifies everything a good wizard almost should be. Mysterious, powerful, wise and compassionate. Grouchiness and riddle-speaking is optional. 3. Luke Skywalker--The 20th Century King Arthur analog. The farmboy who would be king. Over three movies, we get to see Luke Skywalker go from a whiny teenager to an honest-to-goodness hero. His journey isn't smooth, and he does sacrifice, but the story is so powerful and well-done that it's influenced pretty much everyone in my generation. Those people who dress up as Jedi at comic book conventions? They're being fairly honest about how much they'd love to be a hero in Star Wars. Those guys in the banks who talk about businesses going to the Dark Side? Not so much. 2. The Doctor--Doctor Who, that is. A 950-year old time lord from the planet Gallifrey, the Doctor travels throughout space and time, and invariably gets mixed up in some problem or adventure that he tries to solve. He's perhaps the most notable on this list because he doesn't carry a weapon, just a futuristic tool, and he's more apt to talk to a monster than attack it (although running is usually an option, too). He's charismatic, wise and has a strong moral compass. Out of all the heroes on this list, he probably sets the best example. 1. Edmund Dantes--The Count of Monte Cristo. Another "revenge" type hero, but this one is intelligent, skilled, a master of disguise, and does as much good as he does harm. Alexandre Dumas' finest work, in my opinion. And you've gotta cheer for Edmund Dantes, although in later times people want to see him end up with his former fiancee, and in 19th Century France society just didn't work like that. (Comment on this)
Sunday, April 19th, 2009
10:17 pm	Top 10 Villains of all time. Okay...I was reading a few lists of "Top 10 villains in fiction, and I figured I'd do my own. We'll start with limitations. No Anime or manga, first off. No comic books, either. It's way too easy to compile top 10 lists based on those. Without further ado, my top 10 villains in fiction. 10. Professor Moriarity--The man who took out Sherlock Holmes, at least for one story. Arthur Conan Doyle built him up to be a major genius, in every way Holmes' equal. For some reason, the fact that Holmes is scared of this man, even though he doesn't appear in the story, really builds up the mythology. 9. Nurse Rached--She had to be one of the inspirations for Annie Wilkes, from Stephen King's "Misery." She's ultimately in control, does NOT like having her authority challenged, and ultimately drives one of the inmates to suicide. Watch her face when she discovers it. There's impassivity there, mixed with a bit of pride. No matter what happens, she's won against that patient. No remorse whatsoever. 8. Daleks--Anyone who knows a thing or two about science fiction knows these bad pepperpots. They hate every other race in the galaxy, and seek to exterminate every other species. They're frighteningly good at their job, too. Actually, they're just frightening. No matter how ridiculous you think they look, but seeing them gliding towards you on that TV screen still inspires fear in children--and adults--everywhere. 7. Kevin--Okay, this is almost a cheat, seriously. From the Sin City movie, this cannibal is scarily silent, a formidable hand-to-hand fighter, and shows no compunction about killing. The only one who could take him out was Marv, who was brutal enough to handcuff Kevin to himself, then beat the man into oblivion. 6. Toht--From Raiders of the Lost Ark. He manages to be so despicable, willing to do anything. He laughs when Marion is dropped into the Well of Lost Souls to die, which I think sums up his nastiness. 5. Sadako/Samara--Forget Freddy Krueger. Run away, Jason. Laugh at Leatherface. This 10-year old girl has them all beat. Samara, villain of The Ring, may be a ghost, may be a sentient memory, but the thing is--once you've seen the video, she's got you. You can get out of it, though, but the question is, how much do you want to screw over someone else? Do you value yourself that much? Do you pass along the burden? Plus, she comes OUT OF THE TV (or other reflective surface). It remains one of the scariest moments I've ever seen on film. 4. Sauron--THE fantasy villain. There may have been other warlords before Sauron, and there definitely were after, but he is the big one. Until the movies, there was no description of Sauron in the Lord of the Rings books, and yet Sauron's presence is felt everywhere. The ring, a part of him, corrputs nearly all it touches. Then we have the movie version, which makes Sauron an army by himself on the battlefield. Still, the true force of a villain is how his presence is felt, and you feel Sauron's presence almost from the first chapter. 3. Dracula-- He's on here mostly because he's compelling. Mix charisma, real charisma, with intelligence, and then mix in the traditional powers of the vampire. You have a character that, had it not been for Van Helsing, would have achieved his goals with little to no resistance. I mentioned that a good villain makes his presence felt even when he's not there? This is Dracula. For most of the book! 2. Grendel--And before Dracula there was Grendel. He is felt throughout the kingdom of Hrothgar, and the hell of it is that they KNOW Grendel comes for them nightly, and no one can stand against him. It's been repeated to death, but you just can't compare to the original. What may be worse is that there's no reason for Grendel's rampage. He's a force of nature, destroying and killing because he can. 1. Darth Vader--Yeah, kind of a geeky choice and--why am I apologizing? In the first 15 minutes of Star Wars, he's commanding a Star Destroyer, commanding an army that is extremely effective at killing non-heroes, and then, when he gets the captain of the ship, he LIFTS HIM OFF THE GROUND AND BREAKS HIS NECK. That's some pretty high-grade villainy right there. Later on, he beats Obi-Wan Kenobi, who has far and away established himself as the most competent hero in the series. And as far as making his presence felt, watch Empire Strikes Back. Vader pretty much drives the movie. If that weren't enough, he's got a recognizable breathing that is intimidating all on its own, a cool weapon and his own theme song. Best of the best. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 7th, 2009
9:02 pm	Short Story Time! Okay, this one didn't quite make the cut at Pseudopod, but the editor was very encouraging. I thought I'd throw it up here for fun. Overheard at Dyson Collection Agency, June 13, 2:13 P.M. “Hello, Mrs. Sansmark?” “Yes, Hi! My name is Travis, and I’m calling you about the account balance on your credit card.” “Yes, yes I’m aware you have been laid off and money is tight. So, how much can you pay per month?” “I understand. Sometimes you have to choose what is important to you.” “You’re welcome. Being understanding is my job. By the way, how is little Ashley? She seems very quiet today, doesn’t she?” “Don’t bother calling her, Mrs. Sansmark. Instead you just go to the front door. See that little envelope? Why don’t you open it?” “Now, calm down Mrs. Sansmark. Screaming isn’t going to regrow your daughter’s finger.” “I’m the monster? Who’s the one who is refusing to pay her debts?” “Well, you can call the police if you like. But if you do we’ll kill little Ashley. Would you like that, Mrs. Sansmark?” “Good. Now listen. You will pay us back the debt. You will pay it by the end of the day. I don’t care what you have to sell or who you have to kill, but you will give us what is ours. Do you understand? Do you understand?” “Good. Now, we’ll expect payment within three days. If we don’t see it in our post office box we’ll kill your little girl. Okay?” “No, you’re responsible for it getting there on time. You can’t blame the post office for all of your troubles. Your kind always blames others for their misfortune. Look at this as a lesson in responsibility. Do you have any other questions?” “Well, thank you Mrs. Sansmark. I look forward to receiving your payment. Would you like to take a brief customer survey?” (Comment on this)
Monday, January 12th, 2009
1:24 am	I'm trying to figure out if I should post again and, if I do, where do I start? I've got novels of back events forming here... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, October 25th, 2008
1:33 am	The last two and a half months So, things are a little different now. Actually, make that a lot different. I'm not entirely sure where to begin, but why don't I start with the obvious facts. First of all, I'm now in Iowa, in the northeast corner, at least an hour away from a city. Second of all, I have a job, an actual writing job for a company that makes trailers. I start on Monday and it promises to be interesting. I took a bus from Rochester, Minnesota to Michigan. Actually, a series of buses, with layovers varying from one to eight hours. It wasn't exactly the most pleasant experience of my life. On the leg from Lansing to Grayling, one person was actually insane. I'm fairly sure of this because he rambled for two solid hours about literally everything before his stop came. Kind of schizophrenic. I took the bus because I had an interview with a Traverse City group. The interview went...fair. At some point I started to realize I might be out of my depth, but I kept on going. I also worked on a white paper, essentially a research paper. I didn't think it turned out too badly, but then again I did get a message saying that they had hired someone else. However, let's focus on the job I got, rather than the one I didn't get. The company seems to be pretty nice, with nice people in it and it is apparently not hurting for funds, which is impressive given the current state of the economy. In fact, the company is paying to have me stay in a motel while I look for a place, which is extremely nice of them. Honestly, there's only one flaw, and I may or may not get around to addressing that. For right now, my big concern is that I don't get too complacent. It'll be very easy to just...drift away, keep at this job for the next X years, then retire, but that's not quite what I want to do. I really want to get some fiction published, and I really want to keep up my freelancing, which is another topic I want to address. So that's where I'm at. It's pretty nice so far, but for the first time in years I've been completely on my own. And, for the first time, I've found out how much you have to kick your own butt when you have absolutely no pressure on you. Actually, there's also the problem of how much you can procrastinate when you have doubts about what exactly you need to do. Still, I have a job. Which means I have money. Which opens the door for ALL KINDS of fun things to do. Current Mood: hopeful (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 16th, 2008
1:13 pm	Live from a bus depot I'm writing this in Lansing, Michigan, after a day and a night of bus travel. Currently, I'm seated on the floor, next to a power outlet, charging up my laptop and considering doing the same to my phone if it doesn't seem too conspicuous. Actually, being conspicuous in a bus depot is either very easy or very hard, depending on your point of view. Most of the time, you sit on the chairs for an hour or so, waiting for your bus to be announced so you can board it. A lot of sitting is involved. One thing I've found interesting is that the seats at the bus depot are either metal or plastic, with no cushioning. It's as though the depot owners are letting us travelers know we're not welcome for any long length of time. As for the other travelers, I'd say there are the good, the bad, and the flat-out weird. Some guy with a hat decorated with traffic signs occasionally squints at me as though he can't quite believe the moron who is sitting on the floor of the depot. Further down, a white-bearded man in a beret and a blue checkered sport coat that is just painful to look at is on the phone, talking to people on his cell phone between reading passages from the Bible. All things considered, I don't think bus travel is the worst way to go. I paid probably a quarter of what I'd pay in plane fare, and about half the fee of a rental car. It's an interesting way to travel, certainly, so long as you have the time and the inclination. The best thing is the solitude that you can only get from a quiet drive in the country. The worst thing is the layovers, which start off around 10 or 15 minutes, and right now it's looking more like 9 hours. I'm suddenly struck by the realization that I could call up my mom and dad and have them get to Lansing in three hours, then drive back in another three. It's a thought, although I think the biggest thing standing in the way of that is that I already have the ticket, and the price of gas could easily run what I paid for the ticket itself. So I'm back in Michigan. I'm praying that it's not for too long, just for the interview and then back to Rochester after a week or so. (Comment on this)
Friday, August 8th, 2008
12:59 pm	Moving at the Speed of Light This has been an eventful couple of weeks. First, I am now a financial columnist for a new website, which is a lot of fun. I've also added another freelance client to my repertoire, and they've been dishing out a steady stream of articles. The pay is on the low end, but they do provide frequent assignments, and that's always a good thing. I've also gotten interviews! One is with the Mayo Clinic, which is just insane. The other is with a company in northern Michigan, which is also insane. It's very much like working with Novations Learning Technology, which is great. I think I'll talk about both positions more after the interviews. Oh, and I also did a writing test for another potential employer, and they liked it. Things are moving at a breakneck pace here. I think I like it, but I'm kind of out of practice when dealing with several things going on at the same time. What's going to be seriously weird is if multiple companies want to hire me. I have never been in that position before. Granted, the likelihood of that happening is extremely slim, but there's always a first time. Not that I'd mind, either. I have to admit, I'm a little confused at where I should go, now. I'm finally in future planning mode, and I'm acutely aware of just how many options I have. After law school, after a lot of things, I want stability, but I also want to feel fulfilled. I really hope I find the perfect position for me someday. I'd also like to hope it pays enough money per year to fill up one of the Soo Locks, because the whole "starving artist" thing is really for the birds. :\ (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 6th, 2008
12:47 pm	Busy Sorry I haven't been posting lately, but I have been busy. I've got a ton of freelance projects, some job interviews, and some serious travel time coming up. I'll try to post more when I get the chance. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 23rd, 2008
12:44 pm	Grate Adventures My left hand has seen better days, due to a chance encounter with a grater. I'm kind of big on hash browns, you see, and the way one makes hash browns is to grate them. However, my hash browns are different. I leave the skin on the potatoes, which is healthier. More vitamins and minerals, you see. The problem, though, is this--potato skins don't grate well. They stick. Which is a huge problem when you get right down to the last quarter or so. Which leads to the chance encounter with the grater. The first chance encounter was simple--I grated the knuckle of my left thumb, scraping off a decent bit of the epidermis. Needless to say, this hurt. Not quite as much as my second chance encounter, though. In the second chance encounter, which was the next day, I grated the potato down to the last quarter, then proceeded to grate my thumb in the exact same place where I had grated it the last time. I am proud to say I did not scream for very long, maybe only a half-second before I went straight to getting tears in my eyes. So today I was being careful. I was being very careful, and my thumb was nowhere near the grater holes. Which is why I was that much more embarassed when the last bit of potato caught my left index finger and took off not only a bit of skin, but split my fingernail kind of deep. The pain, my friends, was somewhat higher than excruciating. Now, I know that two deep scrapes on my left hand's fingers are not that big a deal compared with other injuries, such as a broken leg or getting your hand slammed in the car door. But still, there are an awful lot of nerve endings in your fingers, and several of them are lit up like Christmas trees right now. I'm thinking of wearing a winter glove the next time I grate potatoes. Chris (Comment on this)
Friday, July 18th, 2008
11:32 am	Restless I'm writing this in a little apartment in Rochester, and I'm feeling restless. I'm not quite sure what brought it on. There are a few reasons I feel restless, from a job that "I have a pretty good shot at getting," according to the recruiter, to some very pointed questions asked by my brother about just what I am doing with my life, to the fact that one major client dried up and I'm left free-falling a bit. Most of those are negative, except for the aforementioned job, which leaves me feeling extremely hopeful and more nervous the more days I go without hearing from the recruiter. However, there are a couple of positive things, too. I managed to get a minor job just by giving one client a nudge, and the job, while slightly tedious, wasn't that bad. I've done a couple of uncredited blog posts that have resulted in some fast cash sent my way via PayPal, and I've been throwing myself into the job of sending out queries and job applications. I won't say how much I billed for so far this month, but it was really nice to see it come about as the direct result of my efforts. Thing is, though, I want some more. I want more money, but more than that I want to feel as though I'm working. In fact, I'm a little anxious right now when I'm not working, disconnected from the Internet and unable to send out more queries. It's kind of a nice feeling, and it's also a feeling I'd like to let go. See, this restless feeling is also making me feel discontent. I really want some results, and I'm not getting them. There's a Carolyn Arends song called "Seize the Day." It was a favorite of mine for awhile, until the point came where seizing the day was all well and good, but it was leaving me drained and not feeling as though I was getting any results. I'm kind of in this "seize the day" mode again, and I suppose that this time, I'd like to feel more that I've come out ahead than anything else. I want something with immediate results. Maybe I just need some more patience. We'll have to see. Chris (Comment on this)
Saturday, July 12th, 2008
3:35 pm	A Good Day Today's been a good day for a number of reasons, which makes me happy. I think the primary reason is that I spent a couple hours research jobs that I'd love to be a part of. It's a nice feeling, sending out cover letters and applications, and being able to dream that this, this is a job you'd be proud to do. On another note, some freelancing clients have also wanted me to start doing some more work for them. I've got now two assignments, two clients who want me to do some work for them in the future, and one that's constantly "waiting in the wings," so to speak. So it's starting to seem like I'm actually being a grown-up about this, which is just too weird. I think I'd almost gotten used to the idea of this being a crazy dream that I'd been pursuing, and that I'd have to start thinking of what kind of office work I wanted to do, which is really depressing. Actually, I'm feeling like I'm actually doing what I should be doing, and I'm even starting to like the stupid parts. I'm even starting to blog a bit more, and working on some strategies to keep myself blogging more often. I'll probably write something more on why blogging is so important for me later. That's all for now. Hope your day is going just as well. Chris (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 10th, 2008
10:35 pm	Hate and the Internet On the Internet, there is a British chap who goes by the name of "Yahtzee," who does a flash commentary called "Zero Punctuation." In this, Yahtzee selects an aspect of video game playing and thoroughly skewers it. He's taken on first-person shooters, PVP fighting games, MMORPGs (such as World of Warcraft), and several others. However, his most recent commentary was on gaming webcomics. If you're unfamiliar with webcomics as a whole, just think about traditional newspaper comic strips, and apply that to the Internet. There are literally thousands of them out there, ranging from the masterful to the "my baby could do better work than that!" variety. Yahtzee, of course, takes on the ones in the latter category, blitzing people who put out garbage in webcomic form, and does it with his usual over-the-top sarcasm and humor that you have to laugh at. I mention this because there's a blog out there named "Your Webcomic is Bad and you Should Feel Bad." In this blog, one of about six people take on a webcomic, and go about criticizing it, except that criticism is not exactly what they do. It's more a mixture of name-calling and swearing about how bad the webcomic is, and what utter wastes of flesh the artist is. It's probably more of a mocking. The thing is, they go out of their way to be nasty to the people during the critique. They engage in some of the more vicious name-calling I've seen outside of hate groups like the KKK or Neo-Nazis, up to and including wishing that some webcomic artists would commit suicide or die, because hey, that would mean they stop doing the webcomic, right? Of course, they do have one or two good points. They aren't afraid to answer criticism, although their usual response is something along the lines of "How worthless are you to be sticking up for these worthless artists?" So what's the difference between YWIBAYSFB and Yahtzee? First, I think that Yahtzee is more obviously over the top. He's pretty obviously playing this as much for laughs as he is for the critique, in the same tradition as Dennis Miller pre-2001, Lewis Black, and George Carlin. Yahtzee's criticisms are also pretty well-founded, as opposed to YWIBAYSFB. The latter has an annoying tendency to point out that things suck without actually getting into WHY they suck, such as the artwork in "Dominc Deegan." Why does it suck? Did it get better? The artwork's obviously changed, so why does it suck now as opposed to earlier? The effect is similar to someone in an art museum walking up to a Picasso or a Jackson Pollack painting, saying, "This sucks! Tell me you didn't spend money on this, guys!" and walking out. But there's also a huge difference in the level of nastiness Yahtzee descends to. While he will shred the games, the characters in it, and take a couple of digs at the people who may actually like the game, he doesn't wish that anyone who likes it would die, or that the game's creator really, REALLY needs to commit suicide in order to make the world a better place. That bothers me. Actually, saying that someone needs to die or commit suicide also puzzles me. Because these guys, once they've gotten done flaying the webcomic and its creator, move on. This is mind-boggling to me. How can you hate someone so much that you want them to die, and then just move on to your next target? At least two webcomic creators that they've singled out have suffered some serious personal blows. Why aren't they revisiting this and trying to rub some salt in their wounds? I mean, if the webcomic artists have offended you so much that only their death can mean something to you, why wouldn't you be taking every opportunity to grind them into the dust? You can either read this as saying that they didn't really mean the artist should commit suicide, or that "go kill yourself" is the new standard of playground taunts. Neither way is all that comforting. Chris (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 8th, 2008
1:58 pm	The entertainment of reality So first, a confession. I've been getting addicted to the Fox reality TV show, Hell's Kitchen, featuring chef Gordon Ramsay. For those of you that don't know, Chef Ramsay is a Scottish chef, who is known for two things--the fact that he has 12 Michelin Stars, a rarity in the cooking world, and his sense of perfection and utter willingness to flay anyone who falls short of his standards. In Hell's Kitchen, the chefs who serve under him get verbally shredded, and the stress is visibly horrific. It doesn't help that most of the chefs get driven to make errors that anyone with one semester of Home Ec would get shredded for. Thing is, I like it. I really like it. I like Chef Ramsay's style, and his unwillingness to put up with the backstabbing and drama of everyone else. It's his kitchen, his rules, and as much as they play up the aspect of his nasty temper, there's only one person really in control in the kitchen, and it is he. Of course, it has a crap-ton of other RealiTV schticks, along with stupid "confessional" voice clips, narrators that manufacture drama and a soundtrack with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer hitting your head against an anvil. However, I bravely managed to sit through the assault on my senses, and I'm still waiting the season finale tonight. Of course, like any good cultural addict should, I searched YouTube for clips of his previous reality shows, and hit upon a phenomenon. Chef Ramsay hosted a RealiTV series in Britain called "Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares." In this series, Chef Ramsay goes to a restaurant that is failing, and attempts to turn it around in one week. It is this series that made me start to respect the man. You see, despite his Marine-salty language and constant berating of the staff, the man knows his stuff. He provides the narration for each episode of "Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares," and first deconstructs all the aspects of the restaurant, showing the audience exactly what is wrong. Then, he works with the owners and the staff to renovate the restaurant, and it's here that his expertise becomes obvious. At least once per show, I find myself thinking "Of course! It's so obvious that this is what you do to design a menu/cook a meal/run a restaurant/run a business!" The true suspense, though, is when Chef Ramsay pays a visit to the establishment at least a month after he's come in to turn things around. While the news is generally good, it's not always so. Some restaurants backslide, and others have closed entirely. I can guarantee more suspense throughout the series than anything Survivor has shown. Overall, it's an excellent series. Now, though, Fox has brought it over to America and glammed it up, calling it simply "Kitchen Nightmares." While it's the same premise, the execution is vastly different. Fox has removed Ramsay as the narrator of the show, which takes away all his expertise, and leaves you in the role of a laid-back third person, instead of a more involved first person. Instead, Fox uses the usual RealiTV tricks to make you care. Quick sound bites and "confessional" shots by the parties involved, with the exception of Chef Ramsay himself. There's more focus on personal drama instead of actually getting the restaurant up and running, and the music cues are still as subtle as a Tyrannosaurus Rex on acid. What's more, there is no visit from Chef Ramsay later on. You, the audience, are left to assume that the restaurant will do well, although Chef Ramsay does provide some narration at the very end that provides an overview of the show, along with his assessment, which doesn't matter so much. After all, it's not as though he's coming back, right? Watching the two, I'm impressed with the little differences. Drama abounds in both shows, but the British make it informational. It's as much showing the work that goes into making a successful restaurant as it is the drama and the confrontations. With Fox, it's about high melodrama. I have to wonder if they actually go out of their way to find restaurants with an owner that is delusional or the classic Dilbertesque Pointy-Haired Boss. Because they do seem to find them. I'd like to have the owner be someone I could acutally feel sympathy for, instead of being someone who cheerily captains a sinking ship, while the staff try to rearrange the deck chairs in order to keep afloat awhile longer. Now, of course Britain does not out-and-out trump the U.S. when it comes to the quality of its RealiTV shows, but I think the two different "Kitchen Nightmares" shows provide a powerful example in force-feeding drama versus letting the drama happen naturally. You can tell when your emotions are being manipulated, versus skillfully showing something that actually is dramatic. On further reflection, this is what I don't like about most American RealiTV shows. They're cramming days' worth of events into a half-hour/hour piece of television, and like as not, the producers are picking out the storylines for the viewers to follow. I'll end this by listing my favorite RealiTV shows, both past and present to give you an idea of what I like. Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares Hell's Kitchen Beauty and the Geek Rock Star So You Think You Can Dance Deadliest Catch Top Gear (Comment on this)
1:39 pm	Getting Back Into the Swing of Things It's been awhile since I last posted. There are a few reasons for that, but the overarching one is a lack of motivation to post. However, I learned last night that when I posted a blog entry, and actually let it set for awhile, it turned out pretty well. The biggest reason is that I was actually able to say everything I wanted to say, and not draw a blank when I sat down. I'm pretty happy with that. So, I've got a backlog of topics I want to talk about. And now I know how best to write about them. I've also come to the conclusion that doing a little free-writing in a blog is a perfect way to get myself "unclogged" and more apt to write down other things, such as quick articles. But like any good idea, we won't know until we see it put into practice. Chris (Comment on this)
Friday, April 11th, 2008
7:02 pm	Good day. So today... I was informed Knights of the Dinner Table will be publishing my article "High Tech in Dungeons & Dragons" in issue #140. Rochester Magazine contacted me and said they'd like to look at some of my writing samples, as they'd like to have me work on some assignments. I purchased tickets to the Blue Man Group. Today has been a great day. Chris (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 8th, 2008
3:01 pm	More Rochesterness and a few media links Alrighty, then. First things first... vee shot600times designergirl bobbibillard sailormur sfeley mainpa snowy-owlet lizvang halfgk Miss enchantedstagey hit me with this "10 random things" Internet meme, which was pretty cool. So I'm officially passing it on to you. Have fun with it. Oh, and while you're at it, visit Miss Jacquie's livejournal and congratulate her for getting her dream job. She has it coming. As for me, my dream job of making a living writing is that much closer to becoming reality. I had an assignment from hell that required a couple of all-nighters, but it was a learning experience that really made me a better person for it. It taught me exactly how much material I can produce under pressure, and set me up for more of the same assignments when they appear again. In the meantime, my brother A. is back and doing the whole doctor thing at Mayo. I think he likes having family members around, which is understandable. We've all been close, and to suddenly be cast into the world of health care can be kind of lonely, especially being in a pressure-cooker profession like doctor. But he's gone during the days and I'm gone during the nights, so we don't see each other and therefore don't get on each other's nerves. Which is also good. Ever since the last assignment ended, I've been keeping busy. I've finally started trying to break into the world of magazine articles (actual, "I've got an idea for a story" magazine articles). I've submitted my first query to a Rochester magazine, which is in fact named Rochest Magazine. We'll see what they have to say in a couple o' weeks. Let's see...what else do we have to report? Oh yeah...tried to go out with a fitness model, who also happened to be a single mom. My offer was rejected, due to her prepping for a fitness competition. She did mention that if I wanted to hire her to be a fitness expert, she was available for $40. I'll chalk that up to bad timing on her part... Oh yes, the Blue Man Group is going to be here come the 19th of April. Pretty sweet, and I'm going to be here for that. Now to actually get tickets, which is kinda hard to do, seeing as I'm still trying to sort out the logistics with A. Finally, two graphic novels that I found extremely good. First up, Superman: Secret Identity. It's about a boy in a world with no superheroes named Clark Kent. It's less about superheroes and more about the idea that everyone has a secret identity--that gulf between who people think we are and who we know we are. Secondly is Animal Man: Deus Ex Machina. It starts off with Animal Man discovering that people are watching him as he fights super-villains, and wonders who these "higher powers" are. It ends with Animal Man confronting the writer of the comic book. It's a surreal work from Grant Morrison, and it will make you question what you're doing when you read fiction. That's all for now. Enjoy some classic T-Rex before you go. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 1st, 2008
5:22 pm	Ten Random Things From miss enchantedstagey Since this is as good a chance to get back into blogging as anything... Here’s how you play. Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog with ten weird, random things, facts, or habits about yourself. At the end, you choose ten people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them to be tagged. Don’t forget to leave them a comment "You’re It!" and to read your blog. You can’t tag the person who tagged you. Since you can’t tag me back, let me know when you’ve posted your blog so I can see your answers. 1. I wrote and drew a comic book. It was interesting, about a guy who goes into Hell to get souls that were sent there accidentally. Of course, ten years later I can see the writing and art were only fair. But I did it, and I've been thinking about doing a webcomic. 2. I'm reaching out for the first time in about four years, grabbing a lot of books, talking with a lot of people, and I'm loving it. A lot of that has to do with the fact that I'm in a place where if you reach out, you can grab something worthwhile. 3. I make really good Chinese food. In fact, I like to cook. I've got an overflowing manilla folder that has entirely too many recipes in it, including Chicken mole and about ten types of grilled cheese sandwiches (I had no idea there were 10 types, either). 4. I believe in Jesus, God and the trinity, but more often than not books on theology and pastor's sermons tend to be filled with a ton of old sayings and analogies that just don't strike me. I want theology that goes deep, that actually helps you. It's pretty hard to come by. Not that I don't appreciate that a lot of people go into seminary or set up websites to attempt to help people, but I think that theologians who are aware enough to understand and preach great truths are rare. 5. I'm double-jointed in my shoulders. 6. I have a great singing voice if I don't go too high up the scale. 7. I like getting a physical check-up. It's nice knowing that everything is running smoothly. 8. When I exercise, I like to push myself to the limit. If I don't feel exhausted by the time I'm finished, I don't really feel as though I've accomplished much. I'm trying to work on that, though, and go more for time instead of effort. 9. I don't have a lot of friends online that I know outside of cyberspace. This is mostly because the people I know in real life...I know in real life. The people in cyberspace are the ones I can't talk to personally. Quite frankly, sometimes they seem much more interesting. 10. I like to talk to random people. You get the most interesting stories out of security guards, hotel lobbyists and librarians, who see a lot but never get the chance to tell their stories. (Comment on this)
Monday, March 17th, 2008
3:16 pm	The Fifteenth Okay, so I said I'd write about this previously. I got a phone number last week, from my mom and dad. It's from a girl I knew in high school, and she let me know that they'd be celebrating my high school's 15th anniversary reunion. In case I haven't been clear in the past, I didn't like high school. I fell into the "nerd" or "geek" category, and since I was pretty much the only one, you can imagine what happened from grades 6 to 12. The hell of it was that I really, really, really wanted to be liked by someone, anyone, and I kind of quickly realized that I was either going to be friendless or the uncool friend the one who's the butt of all the jokes. The thing is, I've met some of the people I went to high school with all these years later, and quite frankly I've also realized that in order to be liked by most of them, I would have to be someone I really didn't care for. I want to do more on the weekends then get plastered and see if I can drive back to my house before I run over a pedestrian or get caught by the cops (yes I'm serious). I don't want my relationships to consist of screwing the girls who were cute or popular or both in high school, competing with the former jocks and bad boys in a game of musical beds. I also do not want to endlessly reminisce about my high school days. See, there are three groups of people that have come out from my high school--the ones who left and are now doing whatever, the ones who stayed and settled down in Mio (and usually got married to someone else they knew in high school), and finally, those who are in Mio, reminiscing about how great high school was, hanging out with their friends when they're not working, and keeping to the same cliques they formed when they were in high school, right up to keeping the same stupid nicknames. Incidentally, there's a lot of crossover between the second and third groups. Think about that. So the thing is, I don't want to go to a class reunion. There are two reasons for this. The first is that, as I've seen, when you hang around people you knew in high school, you slide back into the roles you were previously in. I would like to avoid this at all costs. Second reason--I'm right now a starving artist and I don't have a girlfriend. As far as anyone can determine on the surface, I'm not successful, and I really don't want to admit that to anyone, least of all people who don't have a history of being friendly. Which brings us to my third point. When I went to the small, informal gathering, the people there had talked about how much they liked having me around. This may have been the most surreal moment of my life. Since then, I've done some reading, and come across a psychological web site that suggested people restructure their memories to make happy times seem happier. So they had a good time in high school, and their memories have been restructured to include me in them. Unsurprisingly, I can't go along with that. I can't pretend high school was fun when it wasn't, and that I'm at all glad to see these people and pretend like we were friends. Still, the urge remains, that small part of me trapped back in 1990 who would love for nothing more than to be loved and accepted by them. I'd kind of love to go to this reunion and regale them with stories and be the life of the party, but I'm aware that's not what would happen if I went. People, after all, fall back into the roles they know. I've seen that when I went to the informal gathering. Still, there's a part of me that wonders whether or not people have changed. (Comment on this)
Saturday, March 15th, 2008
7:46 pm	Well, I've been wondering what I could put up here. There's been a lot of stuff, and I don't really know in what order it should go. Things here in Rochester have been, really, pretty good. There's kind of a lack of nightlife (literally every place downtown closes at 8 pm at the latest), but on the other hand it's kind of peaceful. And, since the Mayo Clinic literally dominates downtown, I can kind of see not wanting to have an active nightlife scene. Perhaps if I had some wheels it'd make finding a place that's open late easier. Oh yes, speaking of the car...I got it back. The mechanics fixed it, A. told me what to do to access his bank account, and one bus trip out, the car was in my possession, right up until the motor jerked around like a heroin addict on amphetamines. So back in the shop it goes, with a polite request to the mechanics to GET IT RIGHT THIS TIME. I hope and pray A. learns about car maintenance...he goes through cars like other people go through styles. It's really quite comical, but sad. However, he will be a doctor, he will have a 6 figure income, so hey, he should be able to afford it. Before I dropped the car off, though, I did take the liberty of going to the laundromat. So I have clean clothes, and also some more groceries. Life's going well on that score. I've also been hitting the gym for at least an hour per day. And I am getting thinner, although I think I've been building muscle instead of losing fat. None of the pants I brought fit anymore, which is unfashionable at best, and could be kinda embarrassing at worst. It's a burden I'm willing to live with, though. And there are a few cute women there who I've actually talked with, and lo and behold, have actually asked out in a semi-smooth fashion. I asked out someone a couple hours ago, and she was really, really nice about it (she was just there with her friend and they were going to dinner afterwards). So I'm reaching out...at long, long last. I think that's going to be something I work on when I have to leave--reaching out. I know I don't think Mio has any people worth reaching out too, but...well, we'll see. That reminds me of something else that pretty much deserves its own blog entry. Overall, I've been really happy. This has been a great month, and I'll be sad to see it end. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008
6:44 pm	The Rochester Roundabout So, the first couple of days in Rochester were nice. I walked around, saw the sights in the city, and started hitting the gym on a daily basis. Life, as they say in those books about families and halcyon days, was good. I got a couple how-to assignments, and started writing them. Then the flu hit. By last Wednesday I was coughing up a lung, and by that night I couldn't manage to sleep for more than an hour without waking up and groaning in pain. Actually, the "groaning in pain" phase lasted well into Sunday, along with the coughing and just wanting it to be over while my body moved and felt like that of a 900-year old man. But I got my articles in, and I got my health back (almost), and now I'm finally ready to take Rochester by the tail. Except for the car. The day before A. was getting ready to head for Central America, he cracked the head of his car. This was caused due to a severe lack of maintenance (not Andy's strong suit), and the damage, not to mention the cost, was just this side of getting a new car entirely. So A. left me with two credit card numbers in order to pay for the thing. The end result is that the total was only about double what they said it was going to be (imagine that), and that the secondary credit card is more of a debit card, which BTW can't go over a certain amount that it well and truly needs to. So, I may be trying to take on more writing assignments than is truly good for me in order to fix this. Or I may take up an intense fascination with walking. Not quite sure which one will win in the end. Then again, I am at full health... :) (Comment on this)